All good things come with lots of attitude

Monkey needed new toothpaste, so we walked to the pharmacy and I let her pick out her own tube. She decided on some obnoxious Dora toothpaste. On the way home, she told me that she couldn’t wait to use her toothpaste because it’s gonna taste just like Dora.

Driving home on the West Side Highway this afternoon, listening to the radio while we sit in traffic, this song came on the radio. I didn’t think Monkey was listening as she kept looking out the window and commenting on all the construction vehicles.

Monkey: “Mommy, she says she keeps bleeding.”

Me: “Umm, yeah, she is.”

Monkey: “Oh, no! Maybe she needs a band-aid?”

Me: “Well, I don’t think that’s really what she means.”

Monkey: “I know! I have Hello Kitty band-aids at home. Maybe we can give her one when we get home?”

We’ve been busy this month:

Monkey started soccer classes a few weeks ago. She’s not a huge fan. I sense that the Force may not be all that strong in this one.

This was the look on her face throughout the first practice. Subsequent sessions have not really yielded any better facial expressions.

She did kinda sorta start warming up to it….

Hmm, maybe we can teach her to channel that anger into kicking the ball.

After torturing my child with soccer lessons, we ran off to Maryland to visit with LittleFace.

They petted sheep:

And ran in a kid’s fun run. Well, Monkey ran it in spirit. Add running, in general, to her list of things that she’s not a fan of…yet. BWahahahahah.

She did get her first bib, race shirt, and medal, though.

Back in Brooklyn, we fed our brains at the Murakami exhibit:

Quick story about that one:
So, I knew that he had a few scandalous pieces, but I figured we could just walk by those really quickly and Monkey wouldn’t notice. Umm, yeah, I didn’t realize how big Milk is (the one on the right – warning, NSFW.) It’s huge. Anyways, we walk around a wall and see this statue starting right at us. Monkey asks, “Mommy, what’s she doing with her boobies?”

Me: “Um, well, when we have babies, you can get milk from our boobies.”

As I say this, I notice that RIGHT ACROSS FROM BOOBALICIOUS is Lonesome Cowboy (the enthusiastic one on the left), for our viewing pleasure. I so wasn’t even going to try to explain that one, so I pulled a quick, “Hey, what’s over there?” and dragged her out of that room. I’m so smooth.

So, after I was done torturing and corrupting my child, I payed her off with some new summer dresses. She quickly claimed this one as her favorite and has even worn it to bed a few times. Because, sometimes a girl wants to feel like a fairy princess when she drifts off for the night.

Tonight, after Monkey is out of her bath and is getting ready for bed:

Monkey: Mommy, why are my fingers all wrinkly?

Me: It’s from the water. I left you in the bath too long.

Monkey: They look like raisins. *pops her fingers in her mouth*

Me: How do they taste?

Monkey: (a little disappointed) Clean.